Before the Invasion & one other by Shane Cashman

Issue 3

Before the Invasion

Welcome to 2014
sitting on YouTube all day
where you might explode

Before the invasion
I watched a few documentaries
I studied all religions

Before the invasion
I am an atheist
Knock on the roof
Give us money or die
Ruthless dogs

Before the invasion
Lift a hand to help them
Take them to your neighborhood

Before the invasion
the best joke I’ve heard all day
where a cannibal walks into a butchery looking for a human brain

Before the invasion
Throw yourself from a window
Swim like hell back to Germany
Go explode

Before the invasion
Cannibal parade
sadness for idiots
blood pouring right out into the huge city by the sea

Before the invasion
I studied all religions
I studied a cannibal in your neighborhood
Winning their hearts

Before the invasion
I would die for 10 gold chains
Give us money or die

Before the invasion
figure out how to rule a country
run by children plotting to kill each other
Why would god even create the universe?
Before the invasion

Before the invasion
long live a better world
long live that little cat sleeping in the miniature house garden
turned into a rollercoaster park or a parking lot or a nuclear weapons testing site

 

Before the invasion
I’d get beheaded
I wouldn’t last 15 minutes

Before the invasion
Good luck with all that shit

Source text: Youtube comments from Vice’s “Crime and Punishment in the Gaza Strip” uploaded 07/10/2012

Sadie Doesn’t Want Her Brother To Grow Up

I don’t wanna die wearing a princess dress
I don’t wanna die in the morning news
I don’t wanna die so grown up
I don’t wanna die hunting bears with my bare hand
I don’t wanna die a sweet little girl
I don’t wanna die in a boxing ring
I don’t wanna die with ur bullshit of blabla
I don’t wanna die a drama queen
I don’t wanna die with taxes
I don’t wanna die viral
I don’t wanna die a heartless moron
I don’t wanna die in line at the grocery store
I don’t wanna die when I’m a hundred
I don’t wanna die on Youtube

Nevermind
That’s normal

Source text: Youtube comments from “Sadie Doesn’t Want Her Brother To Grow Up (Original)” uploaded 07/28/2014

Shane Cashman‘s writing has appeared in the New York Observer, PEN Center USA, Word Riot, Neutrons Protons, and elsewhere. In 2015, he was the winner of the PEN Center USA 500-word short story contest judged by Amelia Gray.